Greetings, love bugs! It’s that time of year again when everything is pink and red and heart-shaped and annoyingly lovey-dovey. Thank God Valentine’s Day is only once a year because all of the “love in the air,” or lack thereof, in my case, really gets on my last nerve. Bring on St. Patrick’s Day! Green is my favorite color and green can kick pink and red’s asses any day of the week! Leprechauns are way more fun than Cupid. Guys in diapers who shoot sharp flying objects at people are NOT my cup of tea. I will, however, accept all flowers and chocolate that may come my way on the 14th with no qualms about it, so bring it on. Gerber Daisies are my favorite, by the way. Just so all of you know. Not hinting, just “informing.” Deliver away, my pets.

Lots to tell! First of all, one of my goals for 2007 is to have a more structured schedule. Until now, “structured” was not a word in my vocabulary. Having so many jobs tends to make me a frazzled gal and causes my A.D.D. to kick in with a ruthless vengeance. At last, I finally know where I will be each day of the week, which delights me to no end. I am in the office at Deco Lounge (510 Gray) three days a week in order to bring more fantabulous happy hour events and promote our late nights too, so you can reach me at 713-659-4900 on Monday, Thursday and Friday during the day hours from about 11AM until 3 or 4PM. Check out the DECO DOWNLOAD section in my newsletter to see the latest news and events at Deco Lounge. The rest of the week, I am at Mingalone Italian Grill (540 Texas) so please come eat there (and tip me generously, of course.) Thursday nights I can be found at Identity Bar between 6-9PM for Happy Hour. As you know, I put the “happy” in happy hour and I can offer some freebies when you book parties with me at Identity, the Flat and Deco so what are you waiting for? I have made a departure from St. Pete’s Dancing Marlin, so your new contact there for parties is Stephanie Loyd. She is just as fun as I am, if you can believe there could be TWO banshees in this town! I will book the bands for SPDM through the month of March and then I’ll officially be a retired “darlin’ marlin.” I downsized to five jobs and will be putting more focus back into new business development for R&R Partnership. I’ve neglected R&R for a couple of months and I missed it very much. Should you need a limo, party bus, sedan or shuttle, I’m your girl. We even offer VIP entrance to clubs and bars when you book transportation with us. We will be launching an industry discount rate for transpo on Sundays and Mondays that will be in effect verrrrrry soon, so buckle up and enjoy the (cheap) ride. The promo is called SINsual packages and it includes special extras that no other company offers, like free drink cards etc. Get it? SIN stands for Service Industry Nights. I’m excited about Rob Rodriguez designing the promotional material for SINsual Sundays and Mondays. Just remember, it is only for those who work in the booze biz, so mere mortals need not apply. Stay tuned, party animals….this is going to be BIG! I may even plan a launch party for the deal. Do you all know that R&R Partnership was voted the TOP transportation company of 2006 on www.citysearch.com? Well, it most certainly was…and still IS! Book a trip and see what makes us so darn special (aside from the fact that I am their employee and mascot.)

DECO DOWNLOAD: Resident DJs Danny D and Zany Zaion will launch their new weekly House Music night on Thursday February 15th. DJ Zany Zaion is still going strong with his weekends at Deco. I just love my DJ Zany (he is MIKEY to me) to pieces. He is adorable and is a spectacular music mixologist, might I add! Sunday Nights are packed. Sundays are Latin Night with DJ Zany early, 5-8, and DJ David Cruz (formerly of Sky Bar) from 8-midnight. Hear me, my club children, the place are packed to the gills with hot and spicy peeps of both genders. Check it out for yourself if you don’t believe me and show much love to Enrique and Brittany, they will be the hotties behind the bar in red shirts. Friday the 16th will play host to Zany Zaion’s Valentine’s Party, so don’t miss it. Wait! There is even MORE! This Saturday is the First Annual Masquerade Ball at Deco. Go out and find yourself a fierce mask to wear because there will be a contest for the best mask with cash from Deco and sensational prizes from R&R Partnership and Erotic Cabaret. Happiest of Birthday wishes go out to Lory Ortiz, a.k.a Social Butterfly, who will celebrate her big day on Saturday at Deco with about 125 of her closest friends. Then, on Tuesday, February 20th, Deco is hosting a Fat Tuesday party from 5PM-midnight, so why not call me to book a party for your office? I have a gift for the office that brings the most guests on the 20th, but you need to make a reservation with me to qualify to win the present I have. It’s a damn good present too, if I do say so myself! This is just a newsflash, ladies, take it or leave it, but if you SEE him, you will want to TAKE it!

My owner, Alfred Bonilla, let me rephrase that…DECO’S owner, Alfred, is newly single. I have always said “life is too short to work for ugly men,” and this creature is probably one of the hottest bosses I’ve ever had!That having been said, I feel it is my duty to the females of Houston to announce he is on the market. I may be fired for saying all this, but oh well, too late now! Let me add, it is me and Brittany (my teammate for marketing at Deco) who will be conducting interviews and accepting applications to date him. I must also inform you, that in order to meet him, you must book a happy hour party with MEEEEEE at Deco. Any questions? I guess I need to throw in there is another owner, David, whom I’ve yet to meet. If any of you know him, feel free to inform him he has a gem of an employee in me. Do I sound conceited or what? “Or what” should be your response. Do you think David will like me? It’s not too soon to tell him to give a raise. Just letting you know. It’s weird for me not to meet a boss. Help me, f**kers! Do your job and hail to the queen...only point the “hailness” in David’s direction.

LIKE SEX? That got your attention. A nifty little company called Brown Bag Party offers the latest in sassy, sexy, sultry, sensual (you get the picture, don’t you?) parties for women and it's a great opportunity to stock up on items to add spice to your romance…or add to your “quality” alone time, if you get my drift! Deco Lounge (more specifically: myself, Brittany from Deco and Sarah from Young Active Professionals) are hosting this little shindig for our girlfriends…and maybe their hubbies or boyfriends who want to attend (and who will bring their wallets,) where we will discover bedroom toys, bath & body products by Dickens & Hawthorne, bachelorette party supplies, massage lotions and oils and other goodies. All of this will take place while we have fun with our girlfriends and shop in private during this party while simultaneously being next to the BAR at Deco. Bar and sex. Sounds like heaven on earth to me, my friends. All attendees get their first cocktail compliments of Deco, so how FUN does that sound!? Our party specialist, Rene Dees, will be on-hand to answer questions, and she brings her hubby to her fiestas, Shane, who has road-tested the products (research, baby, research!) and he can advise you which are the most fun to buy. Not to brag, but I’ve seen and I also HAVE some of the products she sells and let me just give you a little something to think about: I am single and I am ALWAYS in a good mood, do you ever wonder why? It’s because of HER PRODUCTS! We will leave it at that. I will have catalogs before the event in case you want to preview the products. Get a sneak peek of what we'll see at www.brownbagparty.com/1045. Please invite more friends to this Brown Bag Party at Deco (510 Gray) on Wednesday, February 28th at 7PM. Don’t be shy! Trust me, you will thank me later! If nothing else, it’s a fun girls’ day out and you will gain an education.

IDENTITY BAR: I absolutely adore my new job at Identity. It was kind of scary, at first, because I’m not in midtown or downtown when I’m at Identity Bar. I’m in “the Galleria Area.” I felt “out of my turf,” but I soon fell in love with the place and I’m digging my claws into Thursdays and making myself at home. Yo, the General Manager and Sean, the token handsome married bartender is always there, each and every Thursday, to make my job a little smoother. I bring in the parties and they make them so unbelievably happy that the patrons will return, irregardless of the fact it is for a Thursday happy hour party or not. The guests aren’t at Identity for me, they return for Sean and Yo because of the great customer service. I’m sort of jealous. Special kudos goes out to Identity’s owner, Mama Jordan, who recently gave birth to a LITTER, oops, I mean quadruplets. More power to you, boss lady, but all I can say is “ouch!” Welcome to the world, Madison, Kennedy, Cameron and Austin. Poor Austin, with three HOT sisters to grow up with and he is the only male. I wish they came out of the womb being 21 so they could come to my events. I’m certain Jordan will keep them hidden from me, even after they are 21. My boss is a smart lady = ) Hey, new topic, Identity just hosted the Young Active Professionals Happy Hour on February 8th, as did Deco on January 19th and I need you all to know it was SMASHING! Sarah is giving me a little competition as the most friendly in this town. Sarah is a gem. She is the sweetest, most congenial, most “let me introduce you to everyone in YAP” lady that I have ever laid eyes on. She effin ROCKS. Don’t know what “effin” is? Call my cell for the definition, 832-885-7274. The next YAP mixer is at the Flat on March 23rd. Be there or be square!

Tonight is Valentine’s Day and if you are a procrastinator, then hurry your ass up and make plans before it’s too late. Imagine me rolling my eyes at you for being such a dork and not planning for V-day. Pathetic fool, you! I will be at Mingalone (Duh! Where ELSE would I be!?) I will give you a sneak preview of our couples-only appetizer because I’ve tasted it and I am STILL smiling! It is two lobster-stuffed raviolis accompanied by a grilled shrimp and then the trio is drizzled with a lobster white wine sauce that SHOULD BE ILLEGAL, it’s so yummy! We are also featuring cappuccino cheesecakes for two that will insure that you get lucky. If you come to Mingalone, request me as your server. I will make you look good because I know our food and our wines and which items on the menu are an aphrodisiac. There is also a splendid list of offerings for other restaurants posted by my mentor, Cleverley Stone at http://www.valentinesday-restaurants.com/. Also, Magan Hunt, President MMH Public Relations gave me the inside scoop on what Rouge has to offer for Valentine’s Day which is TONIGHT for all you bozos who are the ones who shop on Christmas Eve for your sweeties. They’ll have a live music performance by David Syme and cuisine by Chef Aldo. Rouge is at 812 Westheimer so if you aren’t at Mingalone’s, l then be at Rouge, damn it! Plan ahead and perhaps you will receive more head. Did I just say that smutty phrase? My bad.

Riyad Abu Taha is celebrating the 10th anniversary of his Ambassadors Club. Here is a link to his event, so please contact him for further details by clicking here and PLAN TO ATTEND his party because I cannot go to it, which makes me sad and I wish I could. Click away at:

www.i102.photobucket.com/albums/m100/spdm/10_Year_Anniversary.jpg

I cannot be at the event due to the fact Antonio Mingalone is a slave driver (I’m kidding!) so I will be working instead of playing on Saturday the 17th, but I wish I could go to Riyad’s party and to the first annual Masquerade Ball. Send me reports on how they both are.

RANDOM RAMBLINGS: People, I tried Arizona Green Tea Energy Drink and it was awful. I just want to pass that on. It should be called Gross, rather than Green Tea Energy Drink. Eeeeew! Next topic, while I gag over the taste of that effin tea. It’s time to plan ahead for Jungle 15. For the complete list of all the 411 on this year’s Jungle 15 list of four days of activities, visit http://www.junglehouston.com/. This is a phenomenal fundraiser for the Montrose Community. Mingalone Italian Grill is hiring servers. You will always live in my shadow if you work there because I am the Queen everywhere, and not just in this newsletter, but we need servers, nonetheless. Flakes need not apply. Vin, which is pronounced VINE, which claims they will open in March, will be sandwiched in between Mingalone and Roc Bar (two of my favorite places!) Anyway, they are hiring. Apply at Roc Bar. If you have read this far, I will make it JUICY! Take the number 312, it could be a zip code, an IQ or it could be 312 Bistro. Anyway, hypothetically speaking, I checked with an attorney because I had to cover my ass before I blurted out the facts, BUT their paycheck to one (and there could be more than one) employee BOUNCED! Sorry-ass mo-fos! Is there a chance they catered alcohol because they didn’t have a liquor license and they STOPPED payment on a check? Hmmmm, I’m just wondering. So, scammer fellas from Se Vague and 312, if you wish to press a slander lawsuit, I will gladly refer you to my attorney, however, I would never have opened my mouth about your wrong-doings to over 13,000 emails if I hadn’t have already cleared it with my attorney. Pay your bills and THEN end me your complaint letter. I was smart enough to check legalities before announcing it. Everyone who reads this, if I get murdered. It may be from those who I spoke ill of. Leave it at that.